How to go to Sleep When you’re Anxious

Nighttime anxiety is one of the most common experiences I hear about in my practice.  Many clients even report that they can go the whole day without anxiety symptoms but in the evening those feelings creep in.  It can be reality-based with dread for a big project or presentation happening the next day, but it can also be fantasy-based, such as fear of someone breaking-in.  (Although a break-in can happen, it isn’t likely)  These thoughts can begin once it starts getting dark outside or as soon as your head hits the pillow with the intention of sleeping.  For more information about how to cope with anxiety, check out a previous blog post here.

I have a theory about nighttime anxiety that may or may not be accurate, but here it goes.  As human beings, our eyesight is very limited in the dark, therefore, our ability to survive a life or death situation is limited, so I believe that our anxiety naturally increases at night so that our bodies can be more aware and have a better chance of survival.  Again, who knows if this is accurate or not, but that is my theory and I’m sticking to it until someone tells me otherwise.  

One of the biggest mistakes people make with nighttime anxiety is going to bed and not doing anything to address the anxiety beforehand.  If your body is experiencing all of the physical effects of anxiety, then you are not in the best shape to be going to sleep.  Anxiety often means your sympathetic nervous system is activated and ready for fight-or-flight.  This is obviously nowhere close to sleep.  Your body is ramped up and ready to fight off a predator and you are trying to override that response by sleeping.  Even if you are able to override that response, the quality of your sleep is probably not great.

You have to do something to activate your parasympathetic nervous system which naturally calms the sympathetic nervous system.  The quickest way to activate the parasympathetic nervous system is to do some deep breathing exercises.  This can be guided by an app or video, or just simply breathing in to the count of 4, holding for 4, then exhaling for 4.  That technique is called box-breathing.  The other way to increase safety and allow your body to calm down is by focusing on sensory activities.  These can be daily tasks that you do with intention.  Taking a hot shower and visualizing the stress washing off your body, putting on lotion while massaging any areas that are sore or stressed, and having a skincare routine that feels good and smells good.  These are great ways to wind down before bed and relax your body to put yourself in the best state possible for sleep.  Of course there are also some “don’ts” when it comes to bedtime which include anything with blue light, such as television, cell phones, even tablets for reading that have blue lights.  Another “don’t” is doing other things in your bed during the day that may create an association in your mind that your bed is for work and not for sleep.  Also using dim lights while you’re getting ready for bed can help you ease into the darkness.

Sleep hygiene sounds fairly basic and some techniques might be harder to implement in your nightly routine so talk to your Anxiety Specialist about how to make this fit for you.  Contact here!